TAKE A BACK SEAT

.....making a decision to leave the workforce

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#workingmomlifestyle

I would never judge any woman who decides that staying home to raise her kids is a better life choice for herself and her family. No feminist voice can or should make a woman feel bad for the decision to choose her family over a career. But we should all realise that there is no one rule of thumb for deciding to raise a family / keep a home.

As a “somewhat new” working mom, (my son is 16 months now, yikes!!!) I’ve observed severally that young mothers who eventually leave the working class to look after their child (ren) are seen as weak, when we should be seen supporting these women who want to take a step back in their career whilst their family needs them.

A core desire of majority of mothers is sufficient time with the family, a sense of identity and perhaps financial security!!! Unfortunately, when you feel like you don’t have enough of any of those things, it becomes easy to point fingers or judge another woman who had made different choices than you. It may be difficult, but we should try to ignore excessive societal pressures which lay expectations for “having it all” in our lives because when you find that you don’t “have it all”, at that very moment, you may start thinking it’s better on the other side of the fence.

From my perspective as a young career woman / working mom who strives daily to balance career and family, I feel the most important thing is choosing and maintaining a life style that makes you and your family happy because no matter how hard we try or who we are married to, being a mother while simultaneously trying to achieve career / business success, is extremely difficult

With the support of my partner, I made a decision to pursue my career (I have fearfully huge dreams!!!), to juggle the responsibility of the family, work, educational and career development. I know how lucky I am to have a partner who supports me in every way possible, taking on more than a fair share of home responsibilities and parenting, sharing my dreams, backing my goals and listening to my struggles – as I do his.

when it is impossible to meet up with J's Dr's appointment beause of a tight schedule at work....
when it is impossible to meet up with J’s Dr’s appointment because of a tight schedule at work….
so The Hubs takes J to work....
so The Hubs takes J to work….
.....and then to the Dr's appointment.  #ittakesavillage #teamwork
…..and then to the Dr’s appointment. #ittakesavillage #teamwork

So maybe I may “take a back seat” after I have another baby or two more babies or after a third child….who knows!!! But what I’m definitely sure of is regardless of the choice I make, I would keep my confidence up.

Because choosing to leave the workforce as a mom takes strength, as does choosing to stay in it as a mom; so I’ll have no regrets. For now, I love the choice I’ve made, I love what I do and I’ll never know what would happen had I taken a different path.

Love & Light,

Mrs O.

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7 COMMENTS

  1. Nice post. I had to step back for while and I don’t regret it. Still I would never judge a working mum cause I’ve been there.

    • ABSOLUTELY! It takes strength to stay in the work force and strength to leave it too. Either way, keep your confidence up mama, the most important thing is that you have made a decision that’s perfect for you and your family. sending hugs your way x

  2. It’s my first time visiting your blog and I must confess that I this has made me feel more confident now that I am a mom. My LO is 16 weeks and juggling both work and home and of course hubby is not left out has been a real sacrifice.

    At a point, I considered resigning from my current place of work. After reading this article I’m giving myself a really big hug instead of the usual judging I was used to giving me. I do not feel bad anymore. Even though I never got to resign, I will never judge anyone who does so. Motherhood is real sacrifice.

  3. Right now im a student with a 5 month old. Im hoping to start working part time next month. I sincerely hope i can juggle all four. God help me

    • You would do great Hun! If you are determined to make it work, there’s absolutely nothing you can’t do. We are all here to cheer you on mama.

      I’m sending hugs and good wishes your way x

  4. There are times I really feel like quitting. Its stressful having twins as my first babies (double the attention needed) and juggling a job that takes me away from home for a minimum of 10 hours. Hubby helps out with the chores and parenting. But most times I feel judged for working, feels like I am seen as others as neglecting the home front. There are those days I want to throw in the towel and stay at home. I still feel that way everyday. I still feel that way now. But heck! we need the money, and I am still pushing on. I still haven’t gotten how to balance it quite right yet, career-motherhood-and being a wife.

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